Okay, this randomness thing is my life, so why not do it again!

Okay, since this is my second really uber-random post, I will not advise the squeamish to not see this. But it's recommended if you are easily scared.


So, I just took my first guitar lesson! WooHoo! Washington Mutual!

In celebration, will do the Hamster Dance. Hold on a sec...

______________________________________________________________________


Man that hurt. Curse the Hamster Dance! No seriously, I hurt my knee.

Maybe I'll take up curling. Or should I sweep the street? No, I'll just eat salty snacks and lounge around!

I'LL SAVE THAT FOR LATER. OMGOSH! WHY AM I TYPING IN ONLY CAPS? FOR GOSH DARNDARNdarn. Heywaitasec,mycomputerimashingtogetherallthewords! Boohoohoo! Nopinnochioherejustthetruth! ;)

Okay, it was all the wok of Dr. Eggman. You know, the obese dude from Sonic the Hedgehog? He threw a baseball at my screen. Or was it a bass crumpled up? IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?? I WONDER??? OH CRUD THE CAPS THING IS IN ACTION AGAIN!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!

"O, Steven Spielberg, you're the greatest film maker, film maker...
O, and Betty Crocker, you're the best baker, baker...
But I'm the greatest of all...
BEFORE ME YOU MUST FAAAAAAALL!"

Pardon my reverie, but that was one wicked song, don't ya think? I agree, because I know you said "yes, you're the greatest, Master RB". That's skill. Pure skill...

Ugh, Michael Bouble is stuck in my head, so I'm going to remove him from my cerebrum.

Peace out!

The TA Community

Now, a certain PH fellow has been harping on me to lay down that sacred game (TotalA), and become a SupCommer. For those unfamiliar to the game- SupCom (short for Supreme Commander) is like TA's modern nephew. And in stats, its better than TA in almost every way. SupCom has better graphics, better storyline, better user interface, more factions- the works. But for some reason I can't convey, SupCom can't compare to Total Annihilation. So as a struggled to put my feelings into words, I stumbled unto some TA forums (www.tauniverse.com, www.tazone.com). And although some of the talk was typical and crass, I immeadiately fell in love with their random, sarcastic, and witty banter. Here are some quotes:

Trippen: Who else can't get a job for the life of themselves?

I'm know I'm not alone, but how much so on TAU?

I blame flashbang, for his ignorance. (It is a bliss, I suppose)

~~~~~~~~~

Colonel Sanders: Sure, everyone's always in favor of saving Hitler's brain, but put it in the body of a great white shark oooooooohh, suddenly you've gone too far.

~~~~~~~~~

Notthatkindoforc: ... So your locked in a room with flashbang, a seriously ticked off hedgehog, 4 mexican jumping beans and pikachu, wat do you do?"

Colonel_Sanders," I declare these threads too stupid for even flashbang."

~~~~~~~~~

Chocoabom 2047: just to fun-up the forum!

What's your favourite food? tell it here with much enthusiasm, like you told your grandma once!

Chocoabom 2047: Mine is everything but paprika

Tomcat: Lobster.

Francois: Things that are too good for you to even know about them!

Bidigam: All foods on this post seem delicious- If you never ate before in your life.

DoomsDay: I make a mean guacamole.

~~~~~~~~~

DannyU: "Fail" creates a depression in space-time, "flames" eventually "roll" into this funnel, and as critical mass is reached, I eat a kitten whole, and beat up a puppy.

~~~~~~~~~

Get the picture? I could keep going... =)

But anyway, some of these guys have been playing each other for nine years, ever since they were young, and got the game. In a weird way, they kinda seem like a family. Their love of TA and hate of Flashbang keep 'em together. This game has a DEDICATED following, that manages to avoid being cultish. Anyone here know about R2-D2, that beloved droid from StarWars? Or maybe Wall-E? they had been around so long that they developed personalities of their own. In a way, thats kinda how I look at this old game. This game- a game that hardly anyone knows about anymore, a game you won't find on any gamestore shelf, a game with a pitiful excuse for graphics, a game with only the bare bones of storyline- has history. 13 years of it, in fact, and still counting. The kind off spirit SupCom could only dream to have.

Now pardon me if I'm getting all mellow-dramatic about a simple computer game, but their's something beyond gameplay in it that I admire. Anyway, in my opinion, Chris Taylor threw a lot away when he gave up on TA....

P.S. What would YOU do if you were locked in a room Flashbang, a seriously ticked off hedgehog, 4 Mexican jumping beans, and Pikachu?

Prepare for a very, Very, VERY random post...

Read this post at your own risk. If you prefer consistent posts, then you might want to turn away now.



You can read this, but don't say I didn't warn you...



If watermelons could speak, what would they say? "I'm a dang cross between H2O and a fruit!!!"



I mean, I would feel that way... Now, I'm going to quietly hum the UK's national anthem:



"Oh, I don't know this SOOOOOOOONG!"



Come to think of it, I don't know Britain's national anthem... I'll give up then...

Why try? I mean, really? I'm not British! So why must I learn the song to appease everyone else?!

Ugh, you people are getting very annoying: making me sing that songy thing and all, so I'm going to talk about watermelons again.

You've gotta love 'em. They're so round and delicious!

I'm going to stop talking about watermelons and talk about cardboard. If you eat cardboard, you'll have a faint hint of egg mayonnaise in your breath. WHY? Because cardboard tastes like mayo. Period. Don't ask.

How about shoes. In fact, I'm going to telekenetically make one go onto my foot! Oh, bad idea. There goes that expensive vase.

Yeah, have you seen Avatar? I don't really know. Neither do I care. But my favorite characters are the floating, omen-bringing jellyfish things. Or that big bird that the wheelchair guy rides in Navi form...

CHEESE! Told you this post was random.

Should I stay or should I go. Nanananana naaaaaa (in electric guitar sound)! I should stay AND go. And use the bathroom while doing all of this.

LAVATORY OCCUPIED

*Flush*

Ah, that's better. Oh, what was I talking about? Oh yeah, I was talking about that new iPhone 4. THE THING IS A TIME BOMB! I mean, I love iPods, but this one really tries to kill you. Look, at what happened to me. I survived an onslaught of deadly golf balls and whacked an evil fez-wearing monkey with a ping-pong paddle. I was scarred for life.

Ah, mind lapse! Don'ttell me I was talking about a green soccer ball! Curses!

I've got to buy some ShamWow. You know, to clean the oil spill up.

I'm gonna need some more ShamWow. But I can't trust Oxi Clean now. The beloved Billy Mays is no longer the spokesperson.

Peace out!

The Insignificant Yet Awesome Life of an 8th Grader

I have decided to write little stories on the blog about my life. Here's the first one, dubbed "If Music is the Food of Life...*"

I walked into a music shop with my mom and my redhead brother. I gazed upon fine electric guitars, basses, drum sets, and trumpets. Yes, even trumpets. The clerk greets me and asks what I wished to buy. "We would like to buy a guitar for this guy right here," my mom said for me, pointing at me while she talked. The clerk showed me a stool and told me to sit down. My mom asked if I could try some acoustics out, and so the clerk gave me a 3/4ths size Ibanez guitar. The moment I held it, the guitar shined with the light of the sun. Cherubs lifted the guitar into the air and heavenly choruses sang 'Hallelujah' in the background. The voice of the clerk snapped me back to reality "Do you like this one? It's very deluxe, especially for a beginner." I asked if I could test a full-size black guitar. This time, frogs appeared to raise it above their puny bodies and crickets chirped in the background. "I think I'll stick with the Ibanez," I finally said. My mom let me pick out a stand, a tuner, two picks, and a carrying case. The clerk's assistant inserted the guitar into the case and handed it to me. "Here you go, bud," he exclaimed as cheerful as possible (though he seemed tired) and I walked out the door, guitar and accessories in hand. Finally, I had the instrument I had always wanted!

You like? Leave a comment!

*It's part of a Shakespeare quote.

This Can't Be Good For Digestion...

~Democracy's Demise #4~
Enjoy mates

The clack of silverware was all that prevented utter silence from engulfing the room. Mister Emerson didn't talk unless he had to. He preferred to think. And when Emerson thought, no one was safe. Doctor Keltz picked at the decadent meal before him, uncomfortable beneath Mr. E's black eyes.
Clearing his throat, he ventured, "Emerson, I lost a good messenger yesterday. I lent him to that blunderer Rhalington, then never saw him again. He claims he never returned. Do you know anything of this?"
Quiet seconds passed before the man responded. "There are some scary people on Terra Prime. Especially in this area."
Inwardly, Keltz cursed. That boy was supposed to my eyes and ears in Emerson and Rhalington's affairs. Should have known Emerson would smell a rat...
But outwardly, he smiled. "Scary people, eh? I suppose you might be one of them?"
A smile slowly formed on Emerson's face. Then suddenly, he was laughing. Head back, roaring with sickening laughter. Then, as suddenly as it had started, it stopped. Only the smile remained. "Yes, I suppose you could say that."
Keltz shuddered. The last time he had seen Emerson laugh was at a funeral. Trying his best to sound casual, he changed the subject. "Well, Emerson, the night grows late. Perhaps you would care for a glass of wine?"
"Of course."
"Keltz called his attendant over, murmuring, "Two glasses of wine."
As the servant departed, another silence fell upon the pair. It wasn't until the wine had arrived that Emerson finally spoke. "Do you know why I killed him?"
Keltz was suprised by the question. Taking a sip of from his glass, he resp0nded, "No. Why?"
"'Cause I couldn't trust him."
The doctor didn't like where this was going, and he breathed a sigh of releif when Emerson took a draught of his wine. But he never swallowed. His face grew pensive as he swished the liquid around in his mouth. Suddenly, his face darkened, and he spit it directly into Keltz's glass, growling one word. "Poison."
Keltz's veins filled with ice. Emerson continued, rising from his chair as he did so. "Yes, Keltz. I couldn't trust him, so I killed him. Can I trust you, doctor?"
All pretences of confidence had left the man, as he stuttered frantically, "Y-yes, yes!! Y-you can t-trust me!"
Emerson advanced on the quaking doctor, drawing the Chesterton-7 laser pistol from his coat pocket. The barrel of the sleek weapon hovered inches from the man's left eye. Keltz clenched his eyes shut, and felt Emerson's musty breath on his cheek. "Oh, but I don't know if I can." He waited, but the shot never came. Haltingly, he opened a eye. Emerson was practically nose to nose with him.
"I won't kill you, though should. No, instead, my dear Keltz, you will work. You will work on your technology, day in, and day out. You will have no privileges, luxuries, or assistants. And if your work is not complete by the end of the week, you'll wish I had killed you here." The dark-eyed man ground out every word. "Are we understood?"
Keltz was beyond words, but he nodded frantically.
Emerson smiled. "Good." With a shove that toppled the traumatized doctor and his chair, he whirled, hands in pockets, and headed toward the door. The butler rushed to open it for him. Doctor Keltz heard Emerson mutter one phrase just before the door slammed shut. "I'm getting soft with age."

So, what are your thoughts, questions, or reactions? Lemme' know- a good writer lives off of feedback! =)

Super Mario Galaxy 2: Do's and Nintendont's

Hey, while we're on the subject, why not let Mario join the party? Here are some tips for his newest game:



Do's:

• Use long jumps whenever you think it necessary. Do a long jump by running for a bit, then pressing Z for a split-second, and then jump.


• FEED HUNGRY LUMAS! They're starving, for crying out loud! hey need love and care! But most importantly, YOU need stars. All hungry Lumas give you an opportunity to get Power Stars. Feed the Rainbow. Taste the Raibow.
• Get coins and star bits. End of story. Get them and then get the heack out of there.
• Switch with Luigi whenever possible. I mean, HE'S LUIGI! What else is there to say?
• Get power-ups as soon as you see them. They are either necessary or helpful.
• Use your spin to the best of your ability!
• Go with Yoshi. Just hitch a ride. It will all be fine if you have Yosh with ya.

Dont's:

• Do not leave enemies that you think are cute alone.
• Do not rely on Yoshi's flutter jump.
• Do not miss the mouth when feeding a hungry Luma.
• Do not jump when you think the gap is to big.
• Do not stand under any moving light. It will end badly if you do.
• Do not underetimate Goombas. Stupid yet Deadly.
• Do not think that Mario is Kirby. Mario cannot float, so use your jumps wisely.

There you have it, a complete list of do's and dont's for Super Mario Galaxy 2, available for the Wii gaming console.

Hate to Steal Your Thunder, RB...

'Cause I completely agree with you. However, it's been awhile, and the summaries must go on! ;)

Faction: CORE

Unit Type: Kbot

Tech Level: 1

Summary: This unit, the Storm (costing 118 metal and 985 energy, is the Rocko's CORE cousin. And in many ways, is nearly identical to his ARM kin. However, there are a few differences. The first is that the Storm is faster than the Rocko (which I am, btw, giving a 3 instead of a 4 for speed). This not only means reaching the area its needed in faster, but also better evasion of enemy fire (AKA: a longer lifespan). The second difference is rate of fire. Now, before we go any further, I need to say something about animation and TA units. Animation looks cool- the Zeus whipping his gun from his shoulder, the Maverick unclipping guns from his sides, the Hammer opening gun breaches in order to fire, etc. But the sad news is- these animations only slow a unit down. It can't fire until this animation is complete. The Rocko has one such animation, small as it is. Before firing, it has to rotate its missile launcher to face forward (it was facing down) before it can fire. But on the other hand, the Storm has no qualms about opening fire just as soon as he claps eyes on some ARM scum. This means that in a fight, Storms will almost always get off their first volley before the Rockos do. More about rate of fire- the Storm's is slightly higher. However, the Rocko's rockets do slightly more damage. In a one on one fight, just sitting and shooting each other, the Rocko and Storm will die at the same time. However, many will say that the Storm's higher rate of fire is preferable to the Rocko's higher damage- more volleys fired means more hits, and the difference in damage is so miniscule that almost anything a Rocko could kill in a certain number of shots, a Storm could kill in the same number. The last difference between the Rocko and Storm, has actually little to do with the Storm itself, but rather, the factory from which it's built. The CORE Kbot Lab can be gaurded by a construction vehicle- unlike the ARM Lab. And with a Construction Vehicle gaurding it, a Kbot Lab builds units TWICE as fast! This is essentially like having two Labs, and is a great advantage to a CORE player. In fact, Storms, along with Slashers, make up the core (no pun intended) of CORE early ground forces. Like the Rocko, use the Storm for base busting, or to provide support for Slashers. Also, because of their higher speed, Storms can run from enemy forces, and score hits on their mobile forces as they pursue, because having enemy units moving in the same direction at yours, at close to the same speed, makes them almost as easy to hit as stationary targets.
All these things combine to make the Storm a slightly better unit than the Rocko.
Final Summary:

Speed: 1 2 3 4 5

Agility: 1 2 3 4 5

Firepower for Cost: 1 2 3 4 5

Armor for Cost: 1 2 3 4 5

Overall: 1 2 3 4 5

Now, go and run 3 miles, or something! ;)

Thought I'd Chime In

Look...

This TA thing doesn't scare me. It drives me nuts only because people "overdo" it.

I like Brawl because, well, that's the way I am.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not TotalA's biggest fan. But I used to play it for hours on end.

That's when the problems came. I rushed through schoolwork to play it. I skipped time outside just to launch a pixelated weapon at a non-existent rival.

I totally threw the rest of life away.

The same happened with Brawl. And it didn't hit me until I had logged almost three hours per DAY on it. And before this all started, before I even knew ThinAir, I was addicted to Battlefront II, logging five hours on it one time.

But now that I'm off TA and non-aerobic Wii games, I've started running, joined a basketball camp, and will learn to play guitar.

This is not criticism of video games. I still like 'em. But there's a darker side of them too. They suck you into a meaningless world of addiction and false happiness. These words do indeed sound very harsh. But they're true.

Sometimes, you've gotta put down the controller or get your fingers off of the keyboard, and then you will realize that there's more happiness in a real world than a virtual one.

The Work Never Ends...

... when you're a blogger! I'm am currently wrapping up a vacation in good 'ole Florida. Despite this, I'm still up and posting! While I was sitting in the back seat, en route to summer fun, I wrote up a brief account of our journey.

NOTE: All things mentioned during this account actually happened, and all within the 20 some minutes it took me to write this.

Soooo, here it is:

Miles fly past me. I would like to say something really poetic, like “each is distinct”. But they aren’t. So I won’t. Quite honestly, its all a blur of road signs mixed with the rattle of our old Toyota. A veteran traveler could glance at this evidence, and immediately know just what is currently taking place in the short life of yours truly. That’s right: a road trip. I glance out the window, just in time to see yet another McDonalds flash by. Funny thing about those McDonalds. I’ve been on enough road trips not to trust them. You see, they show up every block, consistently- until someone’s got to use the bathroom. Then there’s nary a golden arch in sight. That Ronald guy always was creepy. But I’m rambling (as usual).

As I stare at the keys, wondering what to type next, a wave of carsickness hits me. I look up to relieve the nausea, and notice that a signature Florida rain has begun to blur our windshield. Yup, that’s our destination: the old Sunshine State- known for its rain, ironically. Now, most people would fly to Florida, from Illinois. But this van isn’t full of most people. This is the Krapohl clan on the move. Though I’m sure you’ve heard of us, I’ll remind you anyway that we are world famous (at least in our family) for our traveling skills. Heck, we’d drive to Spain if it weren’t for the Atlantic.

We’re off to see my cousins: the Langstons. Unfortunately, the traveling gene didn’t seem to carry into that side of the family. In short, the Langstons fly, or walk. They don’t drive. But on the bright side, that gives us just one more reason to vacation in Florida- a chore we take very seriously. Hence, the road trip.

I gasp as the laptop nearly careens off my legs. Snagging it just in time, I feel the car fishtail again. A quick look at the driver’s seat and the source of the trouble is clear. Some rousing jazz drifts from the radio, and both my mom’s hands are off the wheel, gyrating in her signature “boogie”. I just smile. That’s mom for you: ever up for some dancing. Behind me, my sister glowers in the back seat, rapped tightly in a blanket, reminding me that I should’ve taken a shower before we left. She does so about once each mile. As she pinches her nose, indignantly and nasally crying out, I return to my writing with a grin.

Up to my elbows in pillows, coolers, and out-dated road maps (no wonder we always get lost), I wrap up my writing. Not that I’m near finished. But the laptop is down to 2% power. And you thought flying was fun. Adios mates.

Also, to my most avid commenters, PelicanDude and DaFizzyMan, how where your vacations to the Mediterranian and Tenesee?